“The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, but in finding something to live for.”
―Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Does the world seem to be getting more complex by the day? Stress, and anxiety, are at an all-time high. And the world seems to be getting more divided every day. When all of this happens, it’s easy to feel bad about life, to live with a pessimistic mindset and to feel like totally throwing in the towel.
When watching the news, it is pretty easy to get overwhelmed by all of the problems of the world. Having the urge to pull the sheets over your head in the morning instead of facing the day is understandable.
It seems like the only two states of being that are available these days are either anxious or numb. Feeling stuck, alone and like no one will understand you. However, this is not the first time in history that humans have felt this way. History is riddled with all kinds of hardship and opportunities to be pessimistic. Even so, we have progressed and overcome challenges.
And even though it doesn’t seem that way, it has never been more appropriate than right now to be optimistic about the future than at any time in human history.
We are more connected, more abundant and more available for positive change than ever before.
It is hard to see the good when the bad is so painful, and exploded on the headlines. It is hard to be optimistic in the midst of so much doubt and worry. It’s easier to be pulled into the drama, living with the idea that to be alive is to be in pain. However, there is so much more to life, than the bad and the ugly. So much more beyond our hurt.
There are so many tools, and skills you can learn to pull yourself out of the dumpster. However there is one thing that if you cultivate this within yourself, you will become happy once again.
This is realizing your Purpose. When you find and live your life’s purpose, everything changes.
Purpose is what will keep you going even in the hardest of times. It’s the thing that keeps you powerful. Purpose is the one thing that changes everything else. And Purpose isn’t what you might think it is. Many people think that purpose in life is something that you do, like your job or the role you play in your family. Being a parent. Being an accountant. Being a sister or brother. Being a business owner.
None of those things are actually your purpose in life. However, they can be an expression of your life’s Purpose. Purpose is an internal emotional state, that you cultivate within yourself and then express it to the world. Purpose is a state of mind, not a specific thing that you do.
And, there are three skills that are helpful when living a life of Purpose:
1. Emotional Awareness – how do I feel now and how do I want to feel?
2. Emotional Intelligence – knowing what to do to feel the way I want to feel.
3. Emotional regulation – doing what it takes to emotionally regulate myself day to day and moment to moment.
The key to success is not as difficult as you might think.
It is the ability to have emotional awareness, and intelligence. I think that emotional regulation is becoming one of the most important skills that you can learn today to be able to not only find your purpose, but thrive in it from now on.
Make sure you are surrounded by the people, environments and mentors who can guide you to learn and embody these skills.
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Talk soon,
Dr. Ilene
